My name's Hannah, and I'm scared of doctors

By Hannah Brown in A doctor's life on Friday, April 10, 2009 @ 19:46

I’m scared of doctors.

No really, I am.  Not like I’m scared of clowns, or birds, but terrified nonetheless.  The weirdest part is that I work with doctors, some of my best friends are doctors, but still, every time I enter hospital doors my blood pressure shoots up, and I start to feel faint.

I’ve recently been diagnosed with eosinophilic oesophagitis, a diagnosis which has come after two years of hospital admissions, surgeries to remove impacted food, a LOT of Buscopan, a gastroscopy, two oesophagoscopies and a newly developed case of white coat syndrome. 

My last operation was very nearly cancelled due to my exorbitant blood pressure levels.  The anaesthetist was lovely, and her communication skills impeccable, but the more I got worked up about not having the operation, the worse it got.  Eventually they decided to proceed, and as soon as I went under my blood pressure dropped to normal levels.

At least I have a diagnosis now, a label.  And I have very warm feelings towards my gastroenterologist (because I was starting to feel like an idiot presenting at A&E with food stuck.  Again), but I wonder how I’ll cope if I need a general anaesthetic again, even though I now know that all my anxiety is psychological?